“Where are those bills? They were due yesterday!”

“Did you floss at all this week?”

“When was the last time you hit the gym?”

Habits. They can be our worst enemy or our best friend. Dropping things on any flat surface when you come in the door at night is very inviting. The problem is that they often get left there, and you can’t find your keys, you miss bills, and you don’t know where the things that you need for the next day are when you get ready to go. This type of habit can cause stress and waste time that could be used for something enjoyable.

Brushing your teeth, planning weekly menus and exercising are also habits. This type of habit can reduce stress, save money and improve health.

Smoking, chewing tobacco, overeating, eating when you’re not hungry, making poor food choices, and biting your nails are also habits. This type of habit often times has an emotional piece that goes with it.

Habits are like a well worn path through a meadow. It’s very easy to stay on the path, your feet know it well. You really don’t have to think about it or even pay attention to where you’re going. In fact, getting off that path takes some conscious effort and a bit of work.

Your first step is deciding where you really want to go. Changing one habit or changing interrelated habits is much easier and more effective then trying to change many diverse habits at once. Deciding to eat healthier goes well with menu planning and meal preparation.

It’s said that it takes 21 days to put a new habit in place. I find it easiest to do it by the month. A new habit each month, reinforcing a habit that seems to be slipping a bit or refining an already useful habit (moving the furniture once a month when vacuuming instead of just catching the traffic area.)

For those habits that have an emotional piece, new habits that you find yourself resisting, or habits that just don’t seem to want to “stick,” hypnosis can be very helpful. Hypnosis can help you find out what your subconscious mind thinks about the habit, why it’s resisting change and how to move forward. Your lifestyle utilizing this new habit becomes very clear with hypnosis and the change becomes easy. When you’re looking for a hypnotist to help you with your habits, make sure that they do more than just use scripts and positive imagery, look for someone that will really dive into the issues.

“Freud, it turns out, had it more right than he knew: far more of the “we” that we consider “us” lives beneath our conscious purview than we ever imagined. Not only are we composed of multiple “selves” often in conflict with one another—unconscious programs, or “zombies” as neuroscientists like to call them, that run far beneath our conscious awareness—the vast majority of our behavior comes from their interactions with each other, not with our conscious selves. (Studies have even shown our conscious minds may not even drive what we’ve always considered them to drive, becoming aware of the intent to move, in one study, almost half a second after the command to move fires from the pre-motor cortex!) As social psychologist Jonathan Haidt writes in his book The Happiness Hypothesis: “The mind is divided into parts that sometimes conflict. Like a rider on the back of an elephant, the conscious reasoning part of the mind has only limited control of what the elephant does.”

The conscious mind, however, is a great explainer. It’s irresistibly drawn into making sense of the world and everything in it, including itself. Unfortunately, it prefers deluded explanations that keep its view of the world intact to true ones that threaten to shatter it. (The most dramatic example of this comes from experiments in which neurosurgeons have stimulated the motor cortices of awake patients, causing them to move their hands. When asked why they moved their hands, patients typically give answers like, “I was waving at that nurse.”)

Given our conscious mind’s propensity to tell stories that make the world cohere even at the expense of the truth, as well as the fact that most of our behavior emerges from places in our minds unseen, it’s little wonder we’re so often wrong about why we actually do the things we do, and the type of people we actually are. Add our ego-driven need to appear to be all things virtuous and good into the mix and we find ourselves mixing a potent recipe for significant self-delusion.”

This brings some light to our person that wants to control her weight, her conscious mind is simply making up stories for what the unconscious mind is doing. That’s where hypnosis comes in, being able to redirect those zombies to achieve the outcome that you’re desiring.

You can see the entire blog at: http://www.happinessinthisworld.com/2011/09/18/how-to-know-yourself/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+HappinessInThisWorld+%28Happiness+in+this+World%29

Hypnosis can help bring perspective to those beliefs that aren’t useful, or even are harmful. So often beliefs that began in childhood when we had a much smaller viewpoint now color and add to our decisions about food, smoking, and the environment around us that causes us stress. Gaining insight on that view and getting rid of the emotional aspect of it can change the thinking and then change your life.

Here’s a link to the complete article.

http://www.happinessinthisworld.com/2011/04/24/the-two-kinds-of-belief/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+HappinessInThisWorld+%28Happiness+in+this+World%29

February 28, 2011, 5:26 pm
Go Easy on Yourself, a New Wave of Research Urges
By TARA PARKER-POPE
Stuart Bradford

Do you treat yourself as well as you treat your friends and family?

That simple question is the basis for a burgeoning new area of psychological research called self-compassion — how kindly people view themselves. People who find it easy to be supportive and understanding to others, it turns out, often score surprisingly low on self-compassion tests, berating themselves for perceived failures like being overweight or not exercising.

The research suggests that giving ourselves a break and accepting our imperfections may be the first step toward better health. People who score high on tests of self-compassion have less depression and anxiety, and tend to be happier and more optimistic. Preliminary data suggest that self-compassion can even influence how much we eat and may help some people lose weight.

This idea does seem at odds with the advice dispensed by many doctors and self-help books, which suggest that willpower and self-discipline are the keys to better health. But Kristin Neff, a pioneer in the field, says self-compassion is not to be confused with self-indulgence or lower standards.

“I found in my research that the biggest reason people aren’t more self-compassionate is that they are afraid they’ll become self-indulgent,” said Dr. Neff, an associate professor of human development at the University of Texas at Austin. “They believe self-criticism is what keeps them in line. Most people have gotten it wrong because our culture says being hard on yourself is the way to be.”

Imagine your reaction to a child struggling in school or eating too much junk food. Many parents would offer support, like tutoring or making an effort to find healthful foods the child will enjoy. But when adults find themselves in a similar situation — struggling at work, or overeating and gaining weight — many fall into a cycle of self-criticism and negativity. That leaves them feeling even less motivated to change.

“Self-compassion is really conducive to motivation,” Dr. Neff said. “The reason you don’t let your children eat five big tubs of ice cream is because you care about them. With self-compassion, if you care about yourself, you do what’s healthy for you rather than what’s harmful to you.”

Dr. Neff, whose book, “Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind,” is being published next month by William Morrow, has developed a self-compassion scale: 26 statements meant to determine how often people are kind to themselves, and whether they recognize that ups and downs are simply part of life.

A positive response to the statement “I’m disapproving and judgmental about my own flaws and inadequacies,” for example, suggests lack of self-compassion. “When I feel inadequate in some way, I try to remind myself that feelings of inadequacy are shared by most people” suggests the opposite.

For those low on the scale, Dr. Neff suggests a set of exercises — like writing yourself a letter of support, just as you might to a friend you are concerned about. Listing your best and worst traits, reminding yourself that nobody is perfect and thinking of steps you might take to help you feel better about yourself are also recommended.

Other exercises include meditation and “compassion breaks,” which involve repeating mantras like “I’m going to be kind to myself in this moment.”

If this all sounds a bit too warm and fuzzy, like the Al Franken character Stuart Smalley (“I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me”), there is science to back it up. A 2007 study by researchers at Wake Forest University suggested that even a minor self-compassion intervention could influence eating habits. As part of the study, 84 female college students were asked to take part in what they thought was a food-tasting experiment. At the beginning of the study, the women were asked to eat doughnuts.

One group, however, was given a lesson in self-compassion with the food. “I hope you won’t be hard on yourself,” the instructor said. “Everyone in the study eats this stuff, so I don’t think there’s any reason to feel real bad about it.”

Later the women were asked to taste-test candies from large bowls. The researchers found that women who were regular dieters or had guilt feelings about forbidden foods ate less after hearing the instructor’s reassurance. Those not given that message ate more.

The hypothesis is that the women who felt bad about the doughnuts ended up engaging in “emotional” eating. The women who gave themselves permission to enjoy the sweets didn’t overeat.

“Self-compassion is the missing ingredient in every diet and weight-loss plan,” said Jean Fain, a psychotherapist and teaching associate at Harvard Medical School who wrote the new book “The Self-Compassion Diet” (Sounds True publishing). “Most plans revolve around self-discipline, deprivation and neglect.”

Dr. Neff says that the field is still new and that she is just starting a controlled study to determine whether teaching self-compassion actually leads to lower stress, depression and anxiety and more happiness and life satisfaction.

“The problem is that it’s hard to unlearn habits of a lifetime,” she said. “People have to actively and consciously develop the habit of self-compassion.”

To see the original article click here

Prevention, Prevention, Prevention
If you’re like most people your first response to hearing about a neti pot will be disgust. Anyone who’s inhaled water while swimming will resist the idea of purposely pouring water in their nose.
But when you think about rinsing away germs, irritants, and mucous it becomes more appealing. Knowing that you can decrease your chances of getting a cold, the flu, or a sinus infection might even make you hurry to get a neti pot of your own.

What the heck is a neti pot? Think small tea pot or maybe miniature Aladdin’s lamp (although I’m still waiting for a genie.) You can find them made of ceramic, metal, or plastic which is great for travel. Look at your local health food store or search online. Here’s my link to some options at Amazon. neti pots

Ready to Try?

1.Once you have neti pot in hand put 1/4-1/2 tsp. of sea salt in the pot. Then add warm water to the salt stirring so it dissolves. Aim for water the temperature of your body.

2.Next hold your head over the sink with your head to the side. Insert the spout of the pot into your nostril and let the water drain out the other nostril. It takes some practice to get the right angle and to not feel like you’re going to drown.

3.After you’ve poured water through both nostrils, bend over and blow into a handkerchief. Don’t blow your nose while blocking one nostril for awhile.

If you know you’ve been exposed to a bunch of sick people (or even one) head straight to your neti pot. It also works well when you’ve been exposed to allergens. And if you end up with a cold or allergy symptoms using your neti pot a couple times a day will help decrease your symptoms and hopefully help you recover more quickly.

More help
Once you get the temperature of the water and the correct amount of salt you shouldn’t feel any discomfort or burning. If you do feel discomfort, play around with the amount of salt you use and the temperature of the water.
If you want more help check out some of the videos on YouTube demonstrating the use of neti pots.
And yes, there are books about using a neti pot. I like this one. Neti: Healing Secrets of Yoga and Ayurveda
Now what are your favorite wellness tools? Join the conversation here.
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Positive reinforcement had it’s beginnings with B. F. Skinner’s work which he called “operant conditioning.” In the decades since he started experimenting with pigeons people have been using these techniques with everything from dolphins, wolves, dogs, and cats to clams. Yes, you can train a clam to close it’s shell when cued. Of course the methodology been tweaked and refined over the years.

My clients and I discuss before hand what will be reinforceable behaviors, how many will be required to receive a reward (very few,) and what the rewards will be (something small that doesn’t take much time.) During the session I’ll walk them through a typical day and we’ll practice rewarding behaviors and thoughts. We also practice getting the reward.

In the animal training community this is often referred to as “clicker training” and consists of 3 parts: the cue, the marker that says “that’s right! Here comes your treat.” and the reward. Studies have found that endorphin levels go up when the animal gets the treat. Which was expected. The endorphins went up more on hearing the marker. Again, it makes sense when you think about it; the animal is anticipating the reward. However, surprisingly, the endorphin levels went up the most when a known cue was given. It’s as if the animal is saying “Yes! I know this!” It appears to work the same with my clients. After awhile just the sight of the food, cigarette, etc. seems to be reinforcing because they know what to do.

Karen Pryor’s “Reaching the Animal Mind” is a great book on the subject of using positive reinforcement for both animals and people.

Give me a call at 503-910-7186 to learn more or set up an appointment.

Either have small tasks or break down larger tasks into smaller bits. After each task or bit is completed you earn a point (move a rock.) It’s very important that the task is small enough that you get the reward quickly in order to keep the motivation up.

After you’ve worked with this for awhile you’ll find that you can increase the number of points needed so that you can have a larger reward (going to a movie) but in the beginning keep the reward rate high, which may mean smaller rewards.

In his book “The Now Habit”, Neil Fiore, Ph.D. states that one of the most important pieces to getting things done is to plan your play time FIRST. Then you know that it’s there and you have something to look forward to. This doesn’t have to be a big time consumer, many short play times work very well.

This weekend I see playing with a furry critter (many to choose from!), a short walk in the park if the weather is nice, a little book reading, and lighting the Christmas tree and sitting by the fire. So, what playful thing are you doing this weekend?